Social Psychology Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love Essays

Social Psychology Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love Essays Social Psychology Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love Paper Social Psychology Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love Paper Romantic and companionate love How can we distinguish between romantic (or passionate) love and companionate love? Discuss with reference to theory and research. It is said that every human has the desire to affiliate with others and we are not stand-alone units. Despite we may get hurt during the affiliation with the other parties, we still desire to be loved and to avoid being isolated, this is mainly due to the social anxiety and loneliness in our daily lives. Research done by Schachter (1959) presented that, people who is under distressing experience will have the tendency to ook for informal social support or attention of the other people, even if they are completely strangers with each other. Although humans have the strong urge to be loved, they often cannot distinguish between romantic (or passionate) loveand compassionate love. 1 . Lees Typology of Love Theory Therefore, there are a number of theories and research are developed by social psychologists in order to explain the difference between romanticlove and compassionate love. The first one is Lees Typology of Loveproposed by John Allan Lee. According to Gregory P. (2012), Lee opined that there are six types of interpersonal ove comprised of three primary types and three secondary types. In Lees book with the title The Colours of Love,he gives explanation to each type of love and resembles each of them with acolour. Just like the colours of a rainbow that are made up of three primary colours red, blue and yellow, he commented that this is the same to the types of love and by fusing these three primary types of loves, six styles will arise. Eros, Ludus and Storge are the three primary types of loves whereas Mania, Pragma and Agape are the three secondary types of loves after the combination between the rimary styles in various ways. Firstly, Eros (Red) lovers are passionate and constantly searching for passionate lovers too. They view their mate in aesthetic way and this usually involves sensual and sexual enjoyment. Eros is regarded as the stereotype of romantic or passionate love. Secondly, Ludus (Blue) lovers are deemed to be flirty and playful as they view their love as a gameplay. They do not concern much about the commitment towards the relationship because love for them is simple and fun. It is often that their love is full of varieties. Thirdly, Storge (Yellow) lovers are affectionate overs that slowly evolves from friendship due to similarity in taste, preferences and beliefs. For them, friendship and intimacy are more significant than sex and passion. Next, Mania (Violet) is the combination of Eros and Judus. This type of love is of high volatility, which means that it goes between the extremes of highs and lows, thus making the relationship full of uncertainties. Manic lovers get Jealous and obsessed easily and they would like to have a controlling power over their partners and the ending of their relationships are usually so devastating that they will end up ourning their lost love for a long time. In the other hand, Pragma (Greem) is the on logicality and practicality driven by the brains. Normally, cost-and-benefit analysis is done before the relationship is carried out and certain social requirements are needed in order to sustain this type of relationship. Lastly, Agape (Orange) is the combination of Eros and Storge. This type of love is selfless, altruistic and unconditional. Agape seems to be the truest love among the other types of love. Cassie H. (2010) states that Clyde Hendrick and Susan Hendrick expanded on Lees Typology of Love theory through extensive research and found out that relationship based on similar love styles seems to stay longer and thereby concluding that people are inclined to find somebody with same type of love styles as their partners and reject others who do not fulfill into the similarity. This theory narrows down the type of love into six, however, it is superficial to categorize the love into different types and this theory is difficult in distinguishing between passionate love and compassionate love. Need assistance with your paper on a related or a different topic? Team of Ascendnaamba.org, top global MBA essay writing service is ready to help right now! Passionate love versus compassionate love 2. 1 Passionate Love Another theory of love is passionate love versus compassionate love theory developed by Elaine Hatfield. According to Kendra C. (n. d. ), Hatfield divides love into two basic types : passionate love and compassionate love. Passionate love has three components namely cognitive, emotional and behavioral. Cognitive component includes viewing the other person or relationship as an ideal and the urge to get to know each other, emotional component focuses on physiological arousal, sexual attraction and the desire for union while behavioral element involves treating the other and being intimate to him or her. Passionate love is linked with other intense emotions. For instance, when our love is reciprocated, we will undergo closeness, fulfillment and ectasy. Unreciprocated love, on the other side, can be devastating in terms of emotions. It is also suggested that passionate love will arise when we meet someone who is ideal to fit the social norms or cultural expectations about what makes an appropriate partner as well as when we feel physiologically and neuropsychologically aroused thinking about or in the presence of him or her. However, the critism about this that being aroused when we meet the other person oes not necessarily mean that we are in love with them and it is unclear about the reason we fall in love as it is limited to only a few conditions. 2. 2 Compassionate Love According to psychologist Elaine Hatfield (n. . ), Compassionate love has traits such as attachment, intimacy, trust, affection and mutual respect. It usually arises out of the feeling of mutual understanding and shared respect for each other. As contrary to passionate love which is momentary, compassionate love is long-lasting and usually can happen on both close friends or romantic partners. Despite that a passionate love is wild and intense with ups and downs, it will eventually cool down over time and lead to compassionate love which is far more enduring than passionate love. This is healthier for a romantic relationship because it is more comfortable to be a partner who gives you security, shared understanding and mutual respect as highs are Just temporary and will not last forever. It is consistency that keeps a relationship flourish. (Melissa R. , 2008). 2. 3 Similarities Something mutually inclusive between passionate love and compassionate love is hat they both tend to seek a partner who is affectionate, good-looking and who love also have a strong need to live entwined or with each other. Other than that, both of them also requires right timing to be in a relationship. Kendra C. , n. d. ) 2. 4 Differences Passionate love is wild at the commencement of the relationship and slowly fades over time whereas compassionate love is steady and enduring. Passionate lovers are guided by emotions without thinking much of the future while compassionate lovers aim to find a lasting companion. 3. Conclusion Majority of the people yearn for ideal relationships that complement the teadiness of compassionate love with the intensity of passionate love, however, it is believed that this type of relationships is rare. In my opinion, compassionate love is more matured and therefore, should be encouraged among the couples because it is more enduring and truly withstand the test of time. Compassionate love is also good for people for are looking for long lived relationships. However, no matter we are experiencing passionate love or compassionate love, so long as the differences between each other are overlooked and tolerated, this relationship will definitely be healthier. (1250 words)

Academic freedom Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 750 words

Academic freedom - Essay Example The problem highlighted by the author here relates to identity, authority and freedom of speech and expression in the world in general. The fact that, nothing in this world is seen in isolation but is relative to other things or dependent on other elements such as culture, religion, geographic similarity, religion, nationality or politics. In light of social sciences and humanities, the author considers race, gender, ethnicity and religion as political factors that hinder learning and knowledge at all levels especially in the academia which is suffering from a lack of academic freedom as the author terms it. He believes that academics forms a basis of what the students would later be like once they leave the academic institute and the social, political and general environment is what defines their future and how they deal with adversities. The realities of social life are bitter but a lot of it can improve if academic culture is transformed. It needs to not teach about a specific dom inant culture and its superiority but it needs to teach people about other cultures and nationalities, about developing tolerance and appreciation for others, about learning what other religions, races and geographically diverse ethnic groups are about. The author argues over the lack of democratic rights, free press and a missing feeling of well-being exists in places like Saudi Arabia, too full of their national pride and religious superiority. In comparison to Arabia, the American academy is seen to be more liberal and diverse, giving the feeling of confidence and freedom to those who belong there. The difference is vast and it is what creates disparities amongst people at a late stage. The argument is in favor of a liberal form of enhanced academic freedom which can help solve problems like national and cultural  intolerance, ethnocentricity and stereotyping.  

Are traditional approaches to security correct to position the STATE Essay - 1

Are traditional approaches to security correct to position the STATE as the referent object of security - Essay Example One should ask themselves whether it is plausible to include other parameters like demography, environment and resources. (Daniel, 1998) This means that the concept of international relations must be redefined; this is because there may be other underlying assumptions that have governed it. There are common strains and factors that have broken national borders. It must also be remembered that communication and information has undergone rapid changes. Besides, finances and capital are flowing all around the world. The clear dividing line that separated foreign and domestic policy is now distorted. This has now caused states to deal with problems in international forums rather than domestically. (Paul, 2000) Security perceptions may either be narrow or wide. Narrow concepts focus on power as the main agenda while wide concepts focus on cooperation. It must be remembered that human rights and international law are crucial determinants in this analysis. There are a number of occurrences that have sparked this debate. The first was the unification of Europe and Germany in the year 1989. Shortly after, there was the September eleventh attack in the year 2001 that posed new challenges to the American government. The security concept is now widening from national security to human or individual security. It has also expanded to include other factors like; actors, food, energy, health and other sectors. (Mathews, 1993) In opposition to the view that national security is of prime importance, other bodies like the United Nations Commission of Human Security have endorsed and proposed the idea of human security. However, traditionalists argue that this concept is too wide. It does not provide a clear outline of cause and effect like national security does. In addition, these conservatives further claim that the concept of global security is a mere complication of an already

Issue Management at Gap Inc. Essay Example for Free

Issue Management at Gap Inc. Essay Introduction Gap Inc. : Low Morale and Absenteeism Low morale and absenteeism of are serious problems of Gap Inc. that cuts across industry. On a distinctive day between 2 and 4% of employees at Gap Inc. fail to show up for work, which does not sound like a high rate of absence, but more time is lost for the reason that of low morale and absenteeism than through strikes and lockouts. The yearly costs of low morale and absenteeism in the United States are estimated to be $29 billion and a change of 4. 99% in the national absence rate changes the gross national product by $10 billion. (London, 2003) A great number of studies are done to identify the determinants of low morale and absenteeism. Many variables are found to be considerably related to indices of absence, the results appear to be unstable across situations and time. The Way Incentives Work Every incentive program is based on a formula for enhancing motivation that engages four fundamental variables: effort, performance, outcomes, and satisfaction. The logic behind these programs goes something like this: employees at Gap Inc. will put in the accurate quantity of effort to meet performance hopes if these part time employees at Gap Inc.obtain the types of outcomes that include pay raises and promotions which will provide part time employees satisfaction. In simpler words, Gap Inc. should provide its employees what they want, and employees will work hard to get it. Effort = Performance = Outcomes= Satisfaction Conversely, the problem with most incentive programs like of Gap Inc. is that they centre exclusively on the submission of outcomes and overlook the three beliefs that are the key to making the motivation solution work: †¢ Can one do it? †¢ Will outcomes be tied to one’s performance? †¢ Will outcomes be satisfying to one? The first conviction compacts with the relationship between employee effort and performance. The second compacts with the relationship between performance and outcomes. And the third compacts with the relationship between outcomes and satisfaction. These three beliefs form the basis of the belief system of motivation and performance. Accepting that these beliefs are decisive preconditions for motivation helps to explain why incentive programs generally yield such lacklustre results like in case of Gap Inc. Since employees do not always hold these beliefs to be true, attempts to improve motivation by using incentives cannot make the grade, even when the incentives are highly desirable ones. Types of Motivation Problems One cannot do it Motivation problem: Lack of confidence Associated feelings: Self-doubt Anxiety Frustration Outcomes are not tied to one’s performance Motivation problem: Lack of trust Associated feelings: Scepticism Disbelief Mistrust Outcomes will not be satisfying to one Motivation problem: Lack of satisfaction Associated feelings: Anger Rebelliousness Low Morale and Absenteeism At Gap Inc. a major transformation attempt only makes difficult the situation. If any of three beliefs are shaky to begin with, organisational change at Gap Inc. can weaken them even further. The result is often serious motivation and performance problems, at a time when organisations can least afford them, and a resultant surge in the negative emotions associated with change. When an employee believes ‘one cannot do it’ for example, one may develop a lack of self-confidence and begin to experience many of the unpleasant feelings that go along with it: self-doubt, anxiety, and frustration. About a year into the change effort, one manager portrayed the inner turmoil one went through by comparing the restructuring to building a ship at the same time one is trying to sail it. (Mele, 2003) Worker beliefs that ‘outcomes are not tied to one’s performance’ can also escort to noteworthy motivation problems, especially lack of trust. This is normally accompanied by feelings of scepticism or disbelief; precisely the emotions that another manager felt when one was told early on change effort that power would be allocated differently. Employee beliefs that ‘outcomes will not be satisfying to one’ often escort to a third major problem, chronic dissatisfaction, and to feelings of anger, rebelliousness, low morale and absenteeism. (Miner, 2002) Like as the negative emotions allied with change can often go undetected, the motivation and performance problems that cause them frequently remain hidden and unresolved. Due to this, managers who lead change are sometimes frustrated in their efforts. They fail to realise that it is not enough to appeal to the intellect of their workers. So managers must also win employees’ hearts in order to implement change successfully. The reason behind why are motivation problems so difficult to uncover is that employees are afraid to speak about them or even admit that they exist like at Gap Inc. Though most employees know when they have a motivation problem, many feel that acknowledging it is tantamount to admitting failure, and, naturally, they do not want to appear weak or incompetent to their manager. The belief system approach is practical method that can help manager at Gap Inc. resolve these problems effectively. It takes the guesswork out of the search for motivation problems and alerts managers to the three principal types: †¢ Motivation problems caused by a lack of confidence. †¢ Motivation problems caused by a lack of trust. †¢ Motivation problems caused by a lack of satisfaction. The approach is based on the expectancy theory of motivation and on the research of Yale University professor Victor H. Vroom. In conducting Vroom’s analyses of why motivation improvement so often fails, Vroom came to the conclusion that motivation at work depends on certain employee expectations or beliefs: that effort will lead to performance, that performance will lead to outcomes, and that these outcomes, when received, will be satisfying. (Thomas, 2004) Like other expectancy theorists, Vroom maintained that the tendency of people to act in certain ways depends on the strength of the expectation that their actions will be followed by certain outcomes and on the perceived value or valence of those outcomes. This combination of expectation and valence is what determines peoples behaviour, Vroom and colleagues argued, and unless both expectation and valence are present to some degree, there will be little or no motivation to act. For example, if a person wants a certain outcome but doesnt feel it can be achieved through one’s efforts, then that person wont be motivated. Similarly, that person will also lack motivation if one believes that a certain outcome can be achieved but is undesirable. The application model relies on structured, facilitated meetings between managers and their direct reports to find the answers to the three basic questions that uncover motivation problems: †¢ Does the employee believe that one’s effort will lead to the expected performance? †¢ Does the employee believe that outcomes will be tied to one’s performance? †¢ Does the employee believe the outcomes will be satisfying? Preconditions for Employee Motivation AT Gap Inc. managers have to note that an employee is motivated to perform when †¢ The employee believes that effort will lead to performance. †¢ The employee believes that performance will lead to outcomes. †¢ The employee believes that outcomes will lead to satisfaction. AT Gap Inc. once a manager has recognised a specific motivation problem, one can then work with the employee to find its cause and develop an appropriate solution. There are several reasons that this model performs far better than managers expect such as: †¢ This model prepares managers and employees for solving motivation problems by getting them to think about these issues before they meet. †¢ This model promotes effective change by clarifying expectations, uncovering hidden agendas, and managing emotions before they escalate. †¢ This model relies on the cooperation and involvement of the one person who knows most about the problem and what may be causing it: the employee. (Caruth, 2001) By gently forcing an accurate diagnosis of problems and their causes, the belief system model increases the prospects of finding good solutions to performance shortfalls. After all, it takes information to solve problems, and the goal of the belief system model is to uncover critical information about performance and motivation and to guide managers and employees in applying it productively. The model works to generate an environment in which managers and employees divide the responsibility for solving performance problems, and it fosters the kind of communication that helps managers maintain the critical preconditions for employee motivation: confidence in their ability to meet performance expectations, trust in others to tie outcomes to performance, and satisfaction with their job and the outcomes that they receive. Works Cited Butkus T. Raymond, Thad B.Green, (1999), Motivation, Beliefs and Organisational Transformation. Quorum Books. Westport, CT. Cameron Judy, Pierce W. David, (2002), Pay and Motivation: Resolving the Controversy. Bergin Garvey. Westport, CT. Caruth L. Donald, Handlogten D. Gail, (2001), Managing Compensation (And Understanding It Too): A Handbook for the Perplexed, Quorum Books. Gorman Phil, (2003), Motivation and Emotion. Routledge. New York. Hanlan Marc, (2004), High Performance Teams: How to Make Them Work, Praeger. London Manuel, (2003), Job Feedback: Giving, Seeking, and Using Feedback for Performance Improvement, Lawrence Erlbaum Associates. Mele R. Alfred, (2003), Motivation and Agency, Oxford University Press. Miner B. John, (2002), Organisational Behaviour: Foundations, Theories, and Analyses, Oxford University Press. Thomas Neil, (2004), The Concise Adair on Teambuilding and Motivation, Thorogood. White Geoff, Druker Janet, (2000), Reward Management: A Critical Text, Routledge. New York.

Dealing With Drugs :: essays research papers

My mother knew sports were the most important thing in my life. She tried to use my love of sports to keep me away from drugs. She told me drugs would keep me from performing at my best when I played football. But I had been reading the sports page since I was a little kid. I knew some of the best athletes in America were using drugs. Guys who could run a hundred yards in less than ten seconds were using drugs. They were doing great. Drugs weren’t hurting their performance. So I didn’t pay any attention to my mother’s warnings, and I started using drugs when I was fifteen (qtd. in Perkins and McMurtrie-Perkins 25-26). On the weekends, there is at least one party planned. Teens will find someway, no matter what to get either drunk or high. Many will lie, steal, or cheat so they can use. Some teens even spend an entire day trying to obtain their drugs of choice. Although many teens don’t use drugs because it is unacceptable, there is an increase in drug use among teens today, because sports athletes, movies, and music make it appear acceptable. It is true, of course, that athletes will and do get reprimanded for the use of drugs, but many still run the risk, and don’t get caught. They either use substances that are illegal in the sport or on the street. Steroids were first used by the Germans in World War II, then the Soviets started using them in sports in the late 1940’s(Cox). It seems that if an athlete gets caught with drugs they receive more publicity, young people see this and think that if they do drugs too then they will get more attention. Furthermore, Many young people consider athletes, actors, actresses, and musicians as role models. They try to model their lives after them, this, many times includes the celebrity’s drug use if they have used before. There are many biographies on television that deal with a celebrity and their drug use. Young people see these bios and think that drug use is just a part of growing up and that they will have to do it sometime so why not get it out of the way (Duncan). Undoubtedly, many actors and actresses have been involved in anti-drug campaigns; still many have been caught or confessed using drugs. They also play many roles in movies and shows in which they use drugs, granted older people know that they are only playing a role, but many younger viewers don’t.

Electronic Intelligence Versus Human Intelligence

It seems that nowadays people pay too much attention to technological advancements that promote information and interpersonal communication. In The Poet and the Computer, Norman Cousins argues that the â€Å"problem of technology is not solely to be more productive and comfortable, more content, but how to be more sensitive, more sensible, more proportionate, more alive. † According to Cousins, the real problem of technology is whether it makes easier or harder for human to know who they are, to identify their real problems.From my point of view, although technology allows people to live easily and efficiently, it cannot inspire people's imagination, nor can it enrich human spirit. Computers can help people access all the information they desire-?new and old, however, as Cousins wrote, â€Å"electronic brains can reduce the profusion of dead ends involved in vital research, but they cannot eliminate the foolishness and decay that come from the unexamined life. † It is u ndeniable that computer made a huge progress in human proficiency, but it also has limitations.People cannot expect electronic brains to help them prevent failures, reflect failures n their lives. Electronic brains know how to decrease â€Å"the profusion of dead end†, but they never reflect those dead ends. Electronic brains are designed to provide the right answers. However, people should not only be satisfied with the results, but also the process. In Chinese schools, teachers often tell students that † failure is the mother of success, you should not be afraid of making mistakes, but you have to learn something from failure, then to prevent it in the future. Therefore, solely depending on technology can only solve issues at hand, being reflective and inconsiderate is the key for human society to make progress. Computers can provide material to get people involved, but they do not identify with the real meaning of the information and stories that they produced. Many people believe that computers can provide the correct answers in the most convenient way. However, sometimes computers cannot process and analyze information to assist people in better understanding.It can also lead to a dead-ended search in some way. Consequently, it is impossible to expect technology to answer the questions that people are filled with. Computer cannot replace human intelligence because technology serves as a medium to assist people in gaining information all over the world. How to further develop the information and to apply it in real lives are the main concerns that need human inputs. Even though technology helps people overcome the obstacles of time and space, it cannot tap into human emotional field.As Cousin states in his article, â€Å"technology cannot connect a man to the things he has to be connected to-?the reality of pain in others; the possibilities of creative growth n himself; the memory of the race; and the rights of the next generation. † In a â€Å"computerized time†, technology allows people to keep in touch anywhere any time, hence many people consider that social media such as Faceable and Twitter are appropriate for communication. Many of them even have become addicted to social networking. They spend hours looking through pictures, answering comments under each post, and chatting with different strangers.Because social networking is so distracting, people often forget to communicate in the most influential way, which is face-to-face communication. Faceable does affect face-to-face communication because it often takes the expression and emotion out of communication. The Joy of actual seeing someone is crying or laughing is being taken away. A person can put his or her pictures of smiling faces on Faceable, but can others feel his or her emotion simply through that photo? People will become gradually disconnected if they spend too much time on social network rather than emotionally, personally connect with f amily and friends.In modern days, people tend to believe that they can automatically get pleasure and enjoyment whenever they want. However, humans need emotional connection and face-to-face communication in order to experience others' feelings and emotions. Technology has a negative effect on humans because it gives people a sense of accomplishment easily. People will indulge in the acceptability; hence decrease the ability to think by themselves. The main reason for this is technology gives people the opportunity to find answers that others have found before us.People will be satisfied with the answers that was already given instead of coming up with new ideas on their own. As Cousins states, â€Å"The computer knows how to vanquish error, but before we lose ourselves in celebration of victory, we might reflect on the great advances in the human situation that have come about because men were challenged by error and dealing with it. † Therefore, people should be aware that even though we are now able to access information rapidly and easily through the Internet than before, it is necessary for us to develop our own thinking ability to meet different challenges.Without the process of struggle and dealing with difficulties, people will easily lose and forget the truths discovered by homeless. Once people start to solely rely on technology, the process of human society will move gradually slowly. Technology is a tool to help people perceive knowledge; and people cannot simply rely on it to solve all kinds of problems. For instance, Google translation is useful software for people to translate different languages. However, it can turn out to be a big problem if people use it in an improper way. In my seminar class, our professor talked about a story, which was related to the technological translation.One of his students once used his mother's engage to write a paper, and then translated it into English by Google's translation. Unfortunately, Google's tran slation could only translate the paper word by word, so that every sentence in the paper was broken. Later on, the student admitted that he translated his paper through Google translation. From this example, it is generally believed that people cannot predominately rely on technology. People should keep a skeptical eye towards the information, which is provided by technology, and then divide the information into useful and useless categories.As Bacon said, â€Å"If we begin tit certainties, we shall end in doubts; but if we begin with doubts, and we are patient with them, we shall end in certainties. † Consequently, people should not be satisfied with the certain answers produced by technology. It is necessary for people to get rid of the strong feeling of self-achievement which technology directly provides. Life is not the extension of technology, thus the primary purpose of technology should not be replacing human intelligence, but rather, facilitating human society progres s. Technology will always serve as a tool for human intelligence no matter how powerful and strong it becomes.Because humans have their own brains, they can create their own reality through imagination. According to Cousin, â€Å"The poet-?and I use the term to include all those who have respect for and speak to the human spirit-?can help to supply the subconscious with material to enhance its sensitivity, hence safeguarding it. † Cousin uses poet to represent humans own imaginative thinking and creativity. He believes the human inputs should be kept as its original form. Therefore, it is important for humans to keep their own spirit and create their own reality, which technology can never replace.We are now experiencing a time when people are easily overwhelmed and distracted. It is generally considered that technology has a negative influence on humans imagination and creativity. It detaches us from others' pain and sorrow, and continuously spread a feeling of instant grati fication. People should be able to use technology for facilitating themselves instead of replacing themselves.

Pride And Prejudice By Jane Austen - 1693 Words

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen was first published on January 28, 1813, and was later republished in May of 2004 by Barnes and Noble. The story follows five young women and their family as they discover what it is to love and to lose love. The Bennets discover how the real world around them views propriety and proper etiquette when it comes to marriages. This tale specifically focuses on one of the eldest daughters, Elizabeth Bennet, as she discovers the true meaning of love from an unexpected source. Despite the fact that this story is about love, it displays many characteristics that were typically of the time period the book is set in, especially in regards to marriage. The interaction between the characters of the novel displays†¦show more content†¦The action begins to rise as Jane Bennet, the eldest daughter, and Mr. Bingley become partial to one another. Everyone around them, including those who disapprove, see an impending marriage. During the progressing relatio nship of Bingley and Jane, the author introduces Mr. Darcy, Bingley’s equally rich friend and a major character, who is intolerably proud. Elizabeth Bennet, the second eldest daughter as well as a major character, despises Darcy and Darcy returns the sentiments. Soon after Jane makes the acquaintance of the Bingley’s, she goes to visit them at their home and falls drastically ill. She is forced to stay there for a long period of time. Elizabeth comes to visit her and also stays. As Darcy spends more time around Elizabeth, he begins to develop feelings for her to his horror. This causes the story to take a turning point due to Darcy’s confusion about his change of feelings, and Darcy experiences a man vs. himself conflict because he desires her against what he knows to be right in the eyes of society. This displays yet another major theme of the story: social class is one of the most important characteristics for a person in the 1800s. Once Jane is well again, th ey return home. One day as the sisters are walking in a town near their home, they meet a militia officer named Mr. Wickham. The sisters soon become very close with